Oh Brother :)

I feel like I need to adopt a brother.

I grew up having an older brother. When I was young, I admired him so much that I tried to be just like him. I listened to "boy music" instead of girly music like my mom wanted me to. I tried to be cool like he was. I made friends with most of his friends. We annoyed eachother to no end, but when he left for college and rarely came back, I realized how much he meant to me. When he came back to visit, I was always really excited and would talk to him as long as he let me. Then I went off to college and then we finally got along and made our brother/sister relationship into something more like a friendship. I got really close to him because I could tell him things that my parents didn't approve of & things that my sister wouldn't understand.

And when he fell in like with the first girl that was good enough for him, he came to me for advice. That was the first time that I felt really important in his life and I will never forget it; I remember the entire environment. It was right before lunchtime on a sunday, I smelled beef roasting & vegetables microwaving, and I was sitting on my desk chair. I could smell the cork of my bulletin board and the fumes of my new-ish duvet cover. He came into my room and sprawled out on my bed like he always did. And then he told me he didn't know what to do because he thourght he had no chance. He kept twisting one of the pillows on my bed. He said there was this other boy that he was sure she was into, who would win her affections. I told him, hey you are the best boy I even know of. Go for it because if you don't, you'll have to live with knowing you never tried. And then he wanted to know how to go about it. I told him to just keep talking to her and see where it went. And now they're going out, crazy about eachother, and everyone would be surprised if they didn't get married.

Now he's in michigan because he got his dream job there. He wasn't sure about moving all the way out there, but I knew he would love the job. When he asked my opinion, I told him he would always wonder what he missed if he didn't go. Even though I didn't want him to move far away, I love him and want what's best for him.

I am so proud of him and still admire him alot. I miss him alot, and the reason I wanted to "adopt" a brother is because sometimes I meet people who remind me of him a little bit, and it makes me more aware of how much I miss my brother. I don't really know how to go about finding someone who would take it seriously and hang out with me like he was a brother. Cuz that's just wierd.